Ballmer Tightens Microsoft Belt

Softly spoken, shy and retiring Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer sent an email to staff yesterday to complain that the company is not as wealthy as everyone thinks. According to Mr Ballmer, stories have been getting out that he is sitting on a fathomless cash ocean of billions of dollars and does nothing more than swim in the mountains of loot. He wanted to tell staff that it is not true because Microsoft needed a lot of cash.

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